Being in control of your life and having realistic expectations about your day-to-day challenges are the keys to stress management, which is perhaps the most important ingredient to living a happy, healthy and rewarding life.
Why is it that we look forward to Christmas and all the glitz and glitter that goes along with it – and then we get stressed out?
For me, I always tried to do too much. I love being busy, and lots of things motivate me, which means I sign up or volunteer for things without thinking about whether I have time or if it will add too much to my load. A really good friend who’s only known me for a few years told me “I see that’s a pattern you have.” She’s absolutely correct! I’m sure my friends get tired of hearing me lament about how busy I am.
In trying to change this pattern, which I’ve done successfully once or twice, I really looked at priorities in my life. Like the time when my family was young. At Christmas time, I always made tons of cookies, squares, sugar cookies, nuts and bolts, caramel corn, butter tarts and mince meat tarts. That’s what my mother always did and I carried on the ‘tradition’. The result was that I ran myself ragged, and after Christmas we kept on eating the goodies for weeks, until we grew tired of them! One year a light came on! “Why am I doing this? Who really cares?” That year I decided to assess what the most popular items were and only make those. It made my life much easier, and no one complained about not having all those cookies and squares.
The best thing you can ask yourself when doing anything is “Why?” It’s a great question! Consider this:
• Why am I doing this?
• Why is this important?
• Does it add value?
Try these few suggestions for lessening your stress this holiday season. You’ll find you will enjoy your friends and family more, feel better about yourself and even find some ‘me time’.
Think before doing!
When you are thinking about an activity, ask yourself these questions:
• What are you doing?
• Who are you doing it for?
• Why are you doing it?
• Is it worth it?
• What outcome do I want to experience?
If after answering the questions, you still think the activity is important and worthwhile, go ahead. You’ll know the ‘why’.
It doesn’t have to be perfect!
Aiming for perfection does not serve you well. It only adds stress and wastes time. Make up your mind ahead of time that you will do a good job, but it doesn’t have to be perfect. When it comes right down to it, no one else cares – they would rather just have you!
Striving for excellence motivates you; striving for perfection is demoralizing. ~Harriet Braiker
Break a tradition!
Just because you’ve done it for years and years doesn’t mean it needs to continue. Please do not lose sleep over something that is creating stress. Get the family to help you and ask the important questions. They might just have another (possibly better) idea!
You’ve probably heard this story:
A young couple got married. The new bride bought a ham, cut the ends off it, and placed it into the roasting pan. Her husband asked why she cut the ends off. Her response was because that was what her mother had done. When she asked her mother why she always cut the ends off the ham before she put it into the roasting pan, she said that’s what her mother had done. So she called her mother and asked for the reason. Are you ready? “Because my roasting pan was too small.”
This season, take a good look at your traditions and decide whether you want to continue them – and why!
I hope these next two and a half weeks will be enjoyable for you, and less stressful. Take some time for yourself.
